i wasn't ready to let them go for good. she's decided to wear skirts again. i feel like an expressive part of my little girl's style has returned. what a warm welcome to spring!
a kind woman explained my user errors and saved me a large service fee. as she hummed along needing no help from me, i was thankful to have learned how to treat it right, even if it's four years late.
she said the candy fairy would arrive on Halloween night while the great pumpkin and the switch witch visited our friends. "other magical beings like elves and santa will be in our house too by Christmas!" he looked terrified.
so it wasn't in the stars for me, but it pushed me beyond what i thought was possible. i'll continue to do whatever it takes to be their life-loving, spirited mama using all her talents.
Even though she's seven, she still needs me to snuggle her to sleep. What if I started the bedtime routine an hour earlier, so we had time for pillow talk in the dark? That's all she really wants.
witnessing them do it reminded me of when we did. i was filled with overwhelming gratitude and joy all over again. the elegant simplicity of this one, has turned me into one of those people that love weddings.
i returned home from running errands, then slowly realized he had vacuumed every room and moved the beds to all the places i had mentioned. i don't want to take him for granted anymore.
i try to focus on tackling the ignored piles of paperwork on my desk. i think of her courage during
yet another first day at a new school. with autumn, i embrace a renewed inward calm.
our doctor reminded me that it's a condition he will outgrow soon, but to expect more episodes in the coming years. it's not detrimental and he's totally healthy otherwise, however; how will i withstand another one?
i told her i'd pick her up early and she said, "no thanks!" when i mentioned we could spend the afternoon paddling on the water together, she said, "well okay". i guess it's going just fine.
last night, she wanted to pack her lunch all by herself. which means i forgot to put a love note in there. i will wait all day to hug her at pick up time.
what a sad return to butchered trees. our cherished hydrangea was completely removed. it's hard not to feel like the landlord abhors our house by the way he treats it. will the backyard be spared?appreciating what's left.
i look over my shoulder and the house I grew up in is gone. thank goodness my family and the colors of a wet seashell found by a child remain, reminding me of home.
is it still a vacation if you are trying to meet a deadline? i will not stop thinking about it until I have given it my best shot. may the subject remind me to breathe.
i slept next to her worried all night. today she's all better. no more sobbing mama. during our evening lake swim, i watched her every move and immersed myself in gratitude, even for sibling squabbling.
they were left just long enough to feel like they were alone. i wanted to get lost inside the towering blueberry bushes in the biggest patch i had ever seen, but she wanted to go home.
the dog was whining pitifully to join them. i was just so grateful. he does the shopping at three different grocery stores to find deals, when i can barely get through one.
it's been almost ten years since I changed my name to theirs. we are still getting to know one another. on family vacation, there is only eat, relax and love, within abundant quiet calm.
yesterday we were sitting on the floor crying. it was a long, healing talk. it felt like we got to the root of it. today, we will embrace good bye. tomorrow he will ask for her.
